Don't smoke don't fight don't light no cigarettesOr else you'll wind up in the canNo jokes no rights sit tight don't fool aroundYou are a guest of Uncle SamStand up look right don't slouch and stand at easeAllow no sex above the kneesWhen I snap you jump into the master planI'll be damnedWell I'll be damnedI'll be damned if I drink or smokeDamned if I steal your jokeI'll be damned if I go for brokeDamned if I doDamned if I don'tDon't talk don't fool don't try to mess aroundI'll make a monkey outta youYou sign your name right on that dotted line boyI'll be damnedI'll be damned if I drink or smokeDamned if I steal your jokeI'll be damned if I go for brokeDamned if I doAnd damned if I don't, yeahCome onI'll be damned if I drink or smokeDamned if I steal your jokeI'll be damned if I go for brokeI'm damned if I doI'm damned if I don'tI'll be damned if I drink or smokeDamned if I steal your jokeI'll be damned if I go for brokeI'm damned if I doI'm damned if I don'tI'll be damnedI'll be damnedI'll be damnedI'll be damnedI'll be damnedI'll be damned
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Don't smoke don't fight don't light no cigarettes
Or else you'll wind up in the can
No jokes no rights sit tight don't fool around
You are a guest of Uncle Sam
Stand up look right don't slouch and stand at ease
Allow no sex above the knees
When I snap you jump into the master plan
I'll be damned
Well I'll be damned
I'll be damned if I drink or smoke
Damned if I steal your joke
I'll be damned if I go for broke
Damned if I do
Damned if I don't
Don't talk don't fool don't try to mess around
I'll make a monkey outta you
You sign your name right on that dotted line boy
I'll be damned
I'll be damned if I drink or smoke
Damned if I steal your joke
I'll be damned if I go for broke
Damned if I do
And damned if I don't, yeah
Come on
I'll be damned if I drink or smoke
Damned if I steal your joke
I'll be damned if I go for broke
I'm damned if I do
I'm damned if I don't
I'll be damned if I drink or smoke
Damned if I steal your joke
I'll be damned if I go for broke
I'm damned if I do
I'm damned if I don't
I'll be damned
I'll be damned
I'll be damned
I'll be damned
I'll be damned
I'll be damned
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