LYRICS
Use A− / A+ to adjust text sizeTalking Bear Mountain Picnic Massacre Blues
I saw it advertised one day,Bear Mountain picnic was comin' my way."Come along 'n' take a trip,We'll bring you up there on a ship.Bring the wife and kidsBring the whole family."Yippee!Well, I run right down 'n' bought a ticketTo this Bear Mountain Picnic.But little did I realizeI was in for a picnic surprise.Had nothin' to do with mountains.I didn't even come close to a bear.Took the wife 'n' kids down to the pier,Six thousand people there,Everybody had ticket for the trip."Oh well." I said, "it's a pretty big ship.Besides, anyway, the more the merrier."Well, we all got on 'n' what d'ya think,That big old boat started t' sinkMore people kept a-pilin' on,That old ship was a-slowly goin' down.Funny way t' start a picnic.Well, I soon lost track of m' kids 'n' wife,So many people there I never saw in m' lifeThat old ship sinkin' down in the water,Six thousand people tryin' t' kill each other,Dogs a-barkin', cats a-meowin',Women screamin', fists a-flyin', babies cryin',Cops a-comin', me a-runnin'.Maybe we just better call off the picnic.I got shoved down 'n' pushed around,All I could hear there was a screamin' sound,Don't remember one thing more,Just remember walkin' up on a little shore,Head busted, stomach cracked,Feet splintered, I was bald, naked. . .Quite lucky to be alive though.Feelin' like I climbed outa m' casket,I grabbed back hold of m' picnic basket.Took the wife 'n' kids 'n' started home,Wishin' I'd never got up that morn.Now, I don't care just what you do,If you wanta have a picnic, that's up t' you.But don't tell me about it, I don't wanta hear it,'Cause, see, I just lost all m' picnic spirit.Stay in m' kitchen, have m' own picnic. . .In the bathroom.Now, it don't seem to me quite so funnyWhat some people are gonna do f'r money.There's a bran' new gimmick every dayJust t' take somebody's money away.I think we oughta take some o' these peopleAnd put 'em on a boat, send 'em up to Bear Mountain . . .For a picnic.
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